Oh yes, please stay!

I drove past another "for sale" sign this morning. There were very wintery clouds which only added more to the grief I felt. And then I go to the trusty Facebook and see how most of my friends are in London. I suppose nostalgia always brings some kind of sadness - everyone is growing up and moving on. What is happening? Funny, i have just got back from abroad and thanked my lucky stars that I was coming home to greater opportunity. And I believe there is. I really do - it is incredibly hard to publish a story, let alone a book review in New York - the competition is soul-destroying. And i would miss that 'something' back in South Africa. It is as Andre Brink said, that 'something' deep in his bones. He doesn't fall into the sentimental and cliched thing with big skies and African sunsets.

I don't blame people for leaving - who wants to live in fear? It destroys every stitch of you. And yet, i don't feel as 'needed' in New York or London, even though their cosmopolitan and cultural pull is significant.

And trust me - there are things to still keep me sane: The Wits Writing centre is constantly holding literary events. People are publishing books and talking about ways to make writing as a lifestyle work. There are real ways to feel that you can contribute to education, literacy, culture etc.

Who knows what will change for me? Maybe things will get worse, but I must hope without being too naive.